If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don't work there, you live in Oregon.
If you've worn shorts, sandals and a parka at the same time, you live in Oregon.
If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed the wrong number, you live in Oregon.
If you measure distance in hours, you live in Oregon.
If you have switched from 'heat' to 'A/C' and back again in the same day, you live in Oregon.
(Even more so if you need to do this in the same hour...)
If you feel guilty throwing aluminum cans or paper in the trash, you live in Oregon.
If you know more than 10 ways to order coffee, you live in Oregon. (Or Washington)
If you stand on a deserted corner in the rain waiting for the "Walk" signal, you live in Oregon.
(If you walk out against the signal and against traffic, you live in Portland)
If you consider that if it has no snow or has not recently erupted, it is not a real mountain, you live in Oregon.
If you can taste the difference between Starbucks, Seattle's Best, and Dutch Bros, you live in Oregon.
If you know the difference between Chinook, Coho and Sockeye salmon, you live in Oregon.
If you know how to pronounce Sequim, Puyallup, Clatskanie, Issaquah, Oregon, Umpqua, Yakima and Willamette, you live in Oregon.
(If you know how to pronounce Glisan with a long "e", Couch with a "oo", then you live in Portland)
If you consider swimming an indoor sport, you live in Oregon.
(Especially Styxx, who's room floods out a lot)
If you know that Boring is a city and not just a feeling, you live in Oregon.
(Jokes about Boring are just that)
If you can tell the difference between Japanese, Chinese and Thai food, you live in Oregon.
If you think people who use umbrellas are either wimps or tourists, you live in Oregon.
(Or they are just foolish. TriMet reports umbrella losses in the thousands annually)
If you actually understand these jokes you live or have lived in Oregon
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